Current Mood: Sleepy

Short post because I'm sleepy and I have school tommorow, along with other stuff. *Whines* And this is supposed to be my holidays...*sigh* That reminds me, I have to cut my fingernails. Its getting hard to type.

OKAY! First off, I hate my sister because she's got me hooked to SATC, otherwise known as Sex and the City.


Being a fan herself, she went and bought the whole series (except for the last one that still hasn't aired!). Argh. And now I want to watch all of them, when I should be doing my homework. Is this shitty or what? Nm. Its a great show actually and I was wondering why I had never noticed before. Its awesome actually. Surfing the internet and I found these quotes, they're really quite good.

Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives? Perhaps if we never veered off course, we wouldn't fall in love, or have babies, or be who we are. After all, seasons change. So do cities. People come into your life and people go. But it's comforting to know the ones you love are always in your heart. And if you're very lucky, a plane ride away.

And especially this one...

Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you, you love, well, that's just fabulous.

It reminds me of Dawson's Creek or Scrubs or Donnie Darko, all the things I loved and cherish and perhaps even the OC which manages itself to have some really deep things. I also began thinking about how everythings going to change next year, again, yes but jesus, it only really hit me that I'm going to have a totally different life next year. And while this year remains to be seen, I regret loosing it deeply. I'll miss being taken care of my parents, and throwing childish temper tantrums, and gossiping late at night with my internet friends and focusing on OB's buttocks...okay, maybe I will still do some of those things, but it won't be the same. It never will. And I hate it. I really do.

Last year, at the beginning I thought I would come to some deep philosophical answer like they do in movies, as bizarre as it is, it comes to them in the middle of the night. Just hits them. And I thought it would hit me. But I've waited and thought, and thought and...nothing. Just emptiness. And waste. And choice. Nothing really fabulous and that's just fucking scary.

What if next year, it changes but I don't. What if next year for me, doesn't come.

~ M.M.W ~




Schnugged at 23:21 |